Proof of My Less-Than-Perfection

In the church we attended in Tucson, there was a common phrase tossed around with smiles, but also nods, because it's so true:

"Confession is good for the soul, but bad for the reputation!"

Well, I know I have a lot of eyes on me every day: what I say, how I act, what I'm wearing and even the expressions on my face. They all influence my children most of all of course, so I have to be ever mindful of the behavior I'm modeling for them. But it's also highly visible to my extended family members, dear friends all over the world, and my beloved church brothers and sisters too.

I am a very open person. I'm honest, and I will tell you everything on my heart or in my mind without thinking it through sometimes. Unfortunately that sometimes means I say things that can be misunderstood as being critical or negative, particularly when I'm posting things online.

I've heard it said that the actual content of communication can account for as little as 7% of the overall message that is conveyed to the listener, while body language and tone of voice will make up 55% and 38% respectively.

I have a very sensitive heart to the feelings of others. On Myers-Briggs personality typing, I score as an ENFJ (more about what that means here.) Basically my real goal in life is to please other people, to include them when I fear they are being excluded, set them at ease and help them feel comfortable when they are not. I do care deeply about the plights of starving, hurting, and otherwise struggling people in our world, and my husband and I try very hard to do even small things to help where we can.

And so it pains me and causes me to lose sleep at night when I think (or know) that I have hurt someone else's feelings, usually because I didn't think through what I was about to post carefully enough. I have several college degrees and a vast love of learning. I will research tirelessly to find the truth about a subject, to make sure I'm not missing important opposing viewpoints or information. But sometimes, I convey my findings in a way that sounds arrogant or elitist or condescending.

I feel terrible if there are any of you reading this who might have had your feelings hurt because of one of these quick posts I fired off. I want you to know that I never mean to offend at all.

So I confess to you all, my dear friends and family, that I am not a perfect being. (A fact you all probably knew well enough already! *winks*) And specifically, I apologize for being overly proud about my knowledge of various subjects, and for making anyone feel minimized because of a hastily-posted comment.

May God's peace be with you all.

~N~